X-Factor Killed In Name of Facebook

In a move that has been claimed as "a victory for the independent thinker", American rock act Rage Against The Machine have soared to the top of the UK charts following a campaign on a social networking site, demoting the rightful owner of the coveted Christmas spot to Number Two.

Rage Against The Machine are notorious for their hard-hitting political lyrics and ethos, and their aggressive cross-over rock/rap style with liberal use of expletives. Never ones to tow the corporate line, they first started releasing their vitriolic message through the Epic label (part of CBS Recordings, which in turn became part of the huge billion-dollar Sony Music Corporation) in 1992. Meanwhile their bitter chart-topping rival, Joe McElderry, who was not born when Rage first hit the scene, is a nice boy from South Shields with white teeth.

The campaign on Facebook, a multi-million dollar private internet company, was designed to prevent the X-Factor Winning Song from inevitably achieving the Christmas high-light.

Brian Washed, from Middlesex, speaking on behalf of the 500000 people who downloaded 'Killing In The Name' in support of the campaign, said "This is serious stuff! Me and everyone else who downloaded it from i-Tunes have sent a very clear message to that smug high-waisted twat that we will not pander to the whim of others and just buy stuff that we are told to like. We are free-thinking people who refuse to comply and act like sheep. To be honest the Rage song is a bit shit and not really my taste at all, I prefer lushy ballads and stuff by George Micheal, but I am an individual and refuse to pander to the corporate bastards at Sony".

When asked for his views, Joe said "Well, I canna complain like cos being a Number Two is still good and me Mam is dead proud an that, and anyways that Cheryl is a great shag and I'm just soo happy an over the moon an that". When asked for his view on being Number One in the UK Popular Music charts, guitarist Tom Morrello said "F*** off you fu**ing fu*ker!"


An early shot of Rage Aganist The Machine at a 'Stop Racism and Bigotry' festival.


Simon Cowell (left) shows which thumb put the big smile on Joe's face (right)


Cheryl Cole with a typical corporate lap-dog